Thursday, January 19, 2006

Chuck Norris has a Sweet, Sweet Ride...

I was doing a bit of research for an upcoming article and somehow got sucked into the world of toys from the 1980's and 90's. I'm not a "retro-crazy" as a lot of people seem to be, but I did see and advertisement for something that keeps making me laugh.
Chuck Norris had a lot of action figures made after him...most of them included some sort of spring-loaded kick thing. It makes sense I guess. But what action figure series is complete without a large vehicle of some sort? There enters Chuck Norris and his Karate Corvette. Seriously.
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Besides the general sadness/strangeness of it all, let me point out something:
If you look closely enough, you can see Chuck Norris throwing up the "devil's horns" as if to say "rock on Ted!" He's supposed to be throwing a ninja star I guess...but really. Chuck Norris is so showing us the horns.
In the name of hunting down old toys that you can't remember what series they belonged to, I suggest spending a bit of time here:
The site design sucks on toast but if you scroll down there's a rocking list of images of random obscure toys. For example: I had no idea the name of those damn things I used to play with all the time were "Spinjas." Spinning Ninjas. Gah. The simple joys of childhood.
By the way, I am now officially saving up my money so I can buy a Karate Corvette in real life. If not that then at least a Tai Bo Geo.
-jared
Update: While looking on the Virtual Toy Chest site, I also stumbled upon this:
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Please don't tell me that in 1986 someone thought playing with overweight Japanese men in diapers would be a profitable idea. I don't want to believe. Oh and not that I need to point it out, but please note that both the above figures can get MORE naked and reveal their highly detailed ass cracks to you. :shudder:

4 Comments:

Blogger Adam said...

And neither of them is named Captain Rectitude? Damn it all to Hell.

12:55 AM  
Anonymous M@ said...

Speaking of Chuck Norris

http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com

enjoy.

4:48 AM  
Blogger Jared said...

Speaking of Chuck Norris:

http://www.ultimateshowdown.org

Enjoy.

6:23 AM  
Blogger Warx said...

Mr. Rogers would totally waste everyone, just like in the song.

"It's a beautiful day in the graveyard, bitch!"

9:19 AM  

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