Jenny Craig is DOOMED
This was a 1st draft of a comic-type thing. It's not funny enough to actually get put on the site (if you can believe that) but the whole mess amuses me enough to force my hand into sharing it.
For the love of God, when I first heard about this I thought is was a joke. But no, A chocolate company really DID buy Jenny Craig. I'm sure on some level it has something to do with obesity awareness or something, but still. That's completely retarded if not a little evil.
Sheesh.
-jared
posted by Jared at 8:45 PM
3 Comments:
Now if only they would purchase Candyland. Just think of it. At the end of the road your pawn could wind up at a Jenny Craig.
did you ever see that infomercial where there's all these hyper-tan bleach blond village of the beautiful-but-damned people on a cruise where the theme is weight loss? it's awesome. their creepy david koreshlike leader brainwashes them all at a bonfire on the beach that night. he's explaining why "you gotta eat" to lose weight. i was on acid when i saw this the first time, so i may be remembering it wrong, but he was using the bonfire as an analogy for your body or something.
he explained how you were the logs and the fire was your metabolism and how the log he had in his hands was "a cheesecake". he throws the cheesecakelog into the fire, saying that "you gotta feed the fire if you want it to burn!"
i was in hysterics, but really really confused.
"fire? log? cheescake? weight loss? WHAT?!"
Don't do drugs, Seth. Drugs are bad.
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