Salsa, Art Crash, Gothic Fashion, and SJG.

What a freaking bizarre awesome week. We'll start with the absurd and work our way upward.

I stopped being shocked by what I found on the shelves here in Germany a long time ago. Sure, it's kind of neat that Coca-Cola has a product unknown to Americans over here called Mezzo Mix and who isn't a little weirded out by the Germans setting up "asparagus booths" like a carnival has just come to town? On my last outing I did notice one thing that was awful. So I bought it and tried it and really wish that I hadn't.

That's tea, in case you weren't sure exactly what kind of product featured both chili flavor AND cherries. Cherry salsa tea. What they don't mention is the distinct TOMATO taste they've thrown in for authenticity's sake. It's just a revolting as you'd imagine. Let's move on with random news as it's all over the place this week.

http://www.headinjurytheater.com/artcrashmay2006.htm

You should have already seen this. The only thing I'd want to add is that I'm a little uneasy about posting the Kathe Koja thing I mentioned right at the end. I think it has something to do with leaving my personal life (mostly) off of the site and it sort of addresses why the heck I started this exercise in too much free time in the first place. Fun for trivia, but still fundamentally emo to the core. But I WILL post it. Soon.

This week also marked confirmation that I may officially be a fashion designer now. I'm going to hold off on more details until the company's site is launched, but they've got a show this fall that will feature (if all goes well) 11 outfits that I drew up for them. I don't know if I should really type "them" since I'm actually part of the company now, but whatever. Goth Industrial Fashion Design. The hell. In more interesting news one of the dresses I designed requires welding a lot of scrapmetal together...I'm really excited to see that this project is really looking like it's going to happen. You never know when you sign onto something like this. Will it actually go someplace or is it just someone else's pipedream looking for followers? I'm happy to say it's the former. Dresses are being made, a fashion show at a club is already scheduled...and someone's going to be wearing an evening gown subtly themed like a squid. Hopefully. Cross your fingers. Just know that you'll be the first to know when their site is up, as it'll be something involving a good number of talented people, some of which I call my friends here in Berlin.

On a final note that'll really make the geeky out there (and my personal friends) really happy, Steve Jackson responded to my query letter positively and I'm sending him a prototype of my card game this Monday for testing and examination. To friends and family (and those kids I met at that party at Binghamton) who's been playtesting the game with me over the past two years: Thank you something terrible. We'll see how it turns out.

That's about all the news I'm going to throw at you right now.

-jared

Who seems to be having a rather productive, frutiful week, except for that damn Salsa flavored Tea.

Art Crash Finale.

Well, it's over. I've nothing more to say except I've got a crapload of stuff to scan. In the meantime, enjoy a painting of a robot in a tuxedo, a request I got from Brian of 8-Bit Theater fame.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v299/OhGodtheRats/atomicrobotuxjaredhindman.jpg

Oh and why the heck am I getting all the self-reflexive emails today? Thanks for letting me know that Sensible Erection, a site I got introduced to earlier today, really doesn't like my website. Or my art. Or my writing. Or me.
http://filtered.sensibleerection.com/entry.php/57323
We take the good with the bad, right? And hell, at least someone found the clown orgasm funny. Sheesh.
-jared

Wikipedia? The Hell?

I just got an email telling me that I show up in Wikipedia now. I don't expect it to the last through the week, but I'm flattered. Except for that whole "he's in Texas married to Cher" bit.

Check it out. It's very short and lame (and wrong), but it's still there.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jared_Hindman

-jared

(The correct answers are Berlin, Germany and Rachel, but whatever. It's still amusing in its own weird little way.)

Edit:

Well, I figured it out, sorta. Seems that I've got the same name as another Jared Hindman who happens to live in Irving Texas....and who likes to edit Wikipedia. This is exactly why I sign things Jared von Hindman whenever I can. There are more Jared Hindmans out there than you'd think.

Visit his Myspace and give him some love. I mean, if you're into that sort of thing.

http://www.myspace.com/nimitzdrumbum07

Art Crash: Day 6, the Quickening

Well, here's the truth of the matter. I'm behind. I don't know if it's because I really put some effort into a few of these or just me trying to keep a human sleep schedule this week or what...but Day 7 just started and now it's a mad scramble to get the last day and half done and looking somewhat decent. I don't know if that means more black and white experiments, but it may. My 24 hour comic starts now too, which doesn't make the workload look any less intimidating. But we'll see.

I'm somehow happier with this crash content-wise already though. None of these long and pointless "Megaman Robot Bosses" or any some such nonsense. I'll save those for drunken Art Crashes or something.

Your sneak peek for today revolves around the mystery that is the Robot, the Ninja, and the Pirate. Enough people have had the ingenius idea to combine the three (including myself), creating a sort of common genesis for the infamous Robotic Ninja Pirate (sometimes also being a Zombie). Since that's sort of become common enough, it didn't take much time for people to come up with alternate parodies of the whole thing. The painting below is based off the idea of "Samurai Kitten Dinosaurs". Don't ask me. I just paint these things.

-jared

Art Crash: Day 4 (The Disease)

You know...I'm glad this Art Crash isn't supposed to last longer than Seven days. Right now I'm in good shape Art Crash-wise....but this morning I woke up sick with a fever. Not a big deal since I didn't plan on going out today, yet that does put a damper on my work pace. I don't have time to scan everything that's been done already, but I can at least share SOMETHING from the Art Crash, right?

I love it when my own art give me the willies.

-jared

(who apologizes if the above post makes no sense. He is, after all, sicker than usual at this point in time.)

Edit:
Ironically a few people on the KoL board are trying to organize a group Art Crash, or something to that effect. The ironic part is its name:

Art Crash Infection.

http://forums.kingdomofloathing.com/viewtopic.php?t=59880

I wish them luck, mostly because marathons like these really put things in focus. Or, as one person put it, it's like living on the moon. Check them it out if you're curious.

Art Crash: Day 2

Man, I'm really under-reporting this particular Art Crash. I think it has something to do with me deciding to do it at the very last minute...and I already know it's not going to be as long as the last one I did (just one week this time). Still, it's going well...despite the same telling stress factors popping up. Apparently there's this three day cycle thing in an Art Crash. Two days of drawing and inking and cleaning, and then one third day to finish a bunch of them. At this very moment I've only completed one painting. Day three starts in only a handful of hours. The good part is that I've got about 66 paintings close to being done. So it's depressing to think that I've only finished one (which is pretty much what "this week's art" is on the site right now), but I've spread the work out amongst 60+ pieces. Gah.

-jared

Art Crash: Desperation (coming soon)

Sorry for the silence, guys. Been working on a few weird projects, one of which may actually start paying me. That said, all I can say is that Monday will start the beginning of the next Art Crash. It'll last at least a week and should include some weird thematic surprises as usual. Thank God I don't have a real job, right?

On topic: If you'd like to suggest something for me to paint during this week's crash, feel free to post it in the blog or email me at Ohgodtherats@aol.com If you want, that is.
-jared

(If you're new and don't know what an Art Crash is, I suggest you check out these here: http://www.headinjurytheater.com/artcrash.htm and here: http://www.headinjurytheater.com/artsmashtequila.htm .)

Oh God the Rats and eBay...

Two interesting facts to share today:
1. For the first time ever, I'm sharing my flat with two rats. A friend went out of town and asked me to babysit them. They're very cute and playful...when they're in their cage. Outside of their cage they're these tiny furry monsters that incessantly poop on me whenever they get the chance. When they're not relieving themselves on me, they're drawing blood with their knife-like claws. Today I had to clean out their cage. This was more challenging than you'd think, mainly because since I don't have pets regularly I don't have another cage to put them in while I'm cleaning their original cage. I can't hold them while I'm cleaning, mostly because I know they would:
a) poop on me
b) cut my flesh
c) escape
d) all of the above.
In all honestly, "D" seemed the most likely. So I had to improvise a solution:

No, I did NOT run the washing machine while they were in there. It was that or the microwave. Somehow the washing machine struck me as the safer bet. Jim, if you read this, know that your rats are fine. They were in their for a few minutes, tops. I swear. Really I do.

On to other news:

2. eBay.
I officially put up "I'm an eBay Whore" series 1 on eBay today. Well, I didn't do it but my manager/older woman says it'd be smarter to say that I did it instead of her. Basically it's just a continuation of last week's experiment, only with paintings of things people might actually search for on eBay. Maybe. I actually put some time and energy into these so, with one exception, I'm pretty happy with them. Funnily enough, the one that I hate is currently the only one that's already been bid on. So if you want a slightly oversized acrylic/watercolor painting on professional watercolor paper (a rarity for me, really) check them out. I plan on doing a few "I'm an eBay Whore" series regularly (that is if they actually sell). This one contains paintings of (brace yourself): Rainbow Bright, Gargamel w/ Smurf, Ghost Rider, Spiderman, a Snork, and Gamera. I'd feel dirty if I wasn't actually happy with how most of them came out.
Check it out, if eBay is your thing:
http://search.ebay.com/_W0QQsassZdivaraeQQhtZ-1
-jared
"eBay whore"

I just opened a Video Sanctuary...

Old videotapes eventually die, their magnetic tape corroded beyond recognition. Also, they take up space. My videostore finally decided they needed to get rid of a bunch of videos to make room. Since I'm the local "bad movie guy" (it's good to be known for something, right?), they asked me dig through their crap and give it a home. Since I'm very poor, being friends with the video guys has always struck me as a smart move...and hell, people who have a career working in a independent video store are worth knowing in their own right. So check out the first two loads of videos:

That's not even a third of what's littering my flat right now. Diseased B-horror and science fiction films have taken over my apartment, in a blatant attempt to pull my attention away from bad comic books. So...are any of these films worth getting excited about? You tell me. A few from the list:

Jesse James meets Frankenstein's Daughter

Billy the Kid versus Dracula

Robinson Crusoe on Mars

Vampire Hookers

I bought a Vampire Motorcycle

Bloodsucking Pharoahs in Pittsburgh

Cannibal Hookers

Zombie Hooker GangBang (not porn, I swear)

Vampire Hookers

The Chainsaw Hooker Massacre (lots of Hookers in bad horror, it would seem)

Mom and Dad save the World

I was a Teenage Sex Alien

Pirhana Women and the Advocado Jungle of Death

Hercules in New York (starring Arnold "it's not a tumor" Governator)

....and so much more. (Over a hundred, in fact.) The rest are also equally great...but just don't have a title that's funny unto itself.

I'm happy. Just had to share the pain and joy.

-jared

Just another word on Crossovers...

You have no idea how, despite my promise to get back to reviewing bad movies, badly I want to write about this little chunk of terror:

Not convinced that'd wound your brain?

I love how they had to actually write "pinch" in action font just so you couldn't miss it. God.

-jared

Edit: On a side note, that auction (mentioned in the post below) is still up and, what do you know, someone bid on it. Neat, right?